Dear 2009....


F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you. F*ck you.

In addition to 2002, you've been one of the worst years I've ever experienced on this green oasis that we call Earth.

I never wish to experience the amount of hurt, pain, strife, heart ache and troubles that I endured these past 12 months.

Please don't take it personal but I'm glad that you only come into my life once and never to return or else I'd have to lie and wait and fuck you up the next time we crossed paths.

~fin

Fish Are Boring (relaunched)

Just incase you couldnt see the original posting of my life….in video form.

Fish are boring….

On & On © Erykah Badu

And when I knew I had to face another day, Lord it made me feel so tired

© Ree Ree Franklin

It's amazing how little portions of a song can just stand out and literally just speak volumes to your soul...that line comes from "NATURAL WOMAN" and though the song itself says little to me that one 3 second segment of Aretha belting out that phrase says everything that I couldn't about today.

I ramble…I mean I ramble a lot. It is a miracle that in real life conversations that I make any sense whatsoever (It’s likely that I don’t but in fear of hurting my feelings people tolerate me and just attempt to grasp onto key points of my ramblings).

I’ve accepted that I’m a troubled soul. Unlike other troubled souls though, I havent found my gift or true talent. Hopefully though, I don’t follow the same demise as many other troubled souls (i.e., Marvin Gaye, Donny Hathaway, Phyllis Hyman, Kurt Cobain and etc.,). I sure as hell hope that I don’t follow the path of Van Gogh or Edgar Allen Poe and the world only realizes my greatness posthumously. Seemingly, with that said, I’ve got to find a way to make my mark on this vast planet soon...

Oh well...it's Sunday, I'm childless and I might as well sh*t, shower and shave and see what these A-town streets has to offer in regards to simple and amusing entertainment


*FYI, I'm still working on the title for my new blog...I'm still keeping this one though because it's the intimate window into my mind but I need something else to ramble (the word of the day) about sports, sex and music. * If you have any suggestions--HOLLA @ ME !


oh and if you're not on SKYPE (that means you too Xina), you're missin' me in all of my unadulterated and uncensored glory.


~fin



sTuMbLE iNtO HaPpInEsS…FaLl InTo JoY.

I fell down the steps…into an mist of laughter. But when I got up to stare intently at those around me, no one was there. I was laughing at the very thought that it could’ve been much, much worse. These were the same steps that caused my son to get $500 worth of stitches (that’s after his insurance paid their 80%). How I stumbled and missed the whole last 5 steps and land in a patch of leaves is totally beyond me but it must’ve been divine intervention of Mister God Johnson himself *THANK YOU LORD*.

Lesson for the day : What doesn’t kill you—is definitely worth laughing at.

Today’s theme song . O'JAYS "Stairway to Heaven"

3 DAYS….


I’m convinced that I have more than one damaging addiction. In addition to my insane addiction to Vanilla Coke ®, Grandma’s® Peanut Butter Cookies,I also have an addiction to a various amount of prescription sleeping pills (Rozerem, Lunestra and Ambien CR). The recent deaths of Heath Ledger, Michael Jackson, and Brittany Murphy have all put some rather morbid thoughts in my head as of late and now I’m trying to stop being so dependent on it all.

So far I’m about 3 days clean…which isn’t nothing in regards to beating any sort of chemical dependency but hey it’s a start. I don’t believe I had half of these issues when I was drinking. (Ha, I kicked one bad habit and picked up about 6 more…GO kcuf’ing figure.

I’m 3 days free of this mind altering substances, my mind is racing and I’m writing like crazy. Just what I need…..a reason to write as if the past months depression and drama wasn’t fuel enough!!! Well obviously it wasn’t because I’ve been scribing away the past couple of hours.

The picture below is my consumption for this evening :



~fin~

Nine.Ten.Eleven.

I forgot what I was going to tell you.

But when I rushed my thoughts and opened my mouth, the words poured out slowly.

I laid with you…and I’ve never even been by your side. Our lips have never met, yet I know exactly what it’s like to kiss you. I taste your thoughts and smile at the bitter sweet remnants in my mind.

I miss you even though you’re never gone…you’re just a mere phone call away. Every time my phone lights up, I look for your picture on the caller I.D. , your voice on the other end. But you’re just that ---on the other end. Never near. Never where I can hold you. Never where I can smell your scent on the bed from the action of the night before.

Is it just a dream. Have you stayed away too long. How can I convince you that this is your home. Last night I laid with you and I’ve never been by your side.

How can I get next to you so soon? I have so much to say and no way to tell you. I’ve longed to be with you for most of my life…and now I want you as my wife.

If only you knew that.

Nine.Ten.Eleven

turn.around.and.don’t.look.back

If I could just walk away.

I would.

If It were that easy then it would be.

Sometimes I just want it all to just up and end.

But there’s a part of me attached.

That part that doesn’t want to lose a good friend.

If I could just walk away.

I’d leave, close the door and never look back.

But when I had nowhere to go and no one to turn to---you were right there.

You had my back when I didn’t know I needed the support.

If I could just walk away.

I’d do so without a tear or a second thought.

But it’s deeper than what it appears to be on the surface.

If only I could just walk away.

I would.

I haven’t been myself lately…


I’ve been in and out of consciousness the past few weeks. My life, my thoughts and everything about and around me have been shaken up and turned into a tizzy. I wish I could explain why but there’s something seriously bothering me….well maybe it’s not one specific thing. It’s an accumulation of a lot of things. I feel like I am having an out of body experience. I can see things happening before my eyes and yet I’m slow to react and try to change the chain of unfortunate events. Maybe what they say about me is right----perhaps I promote drama. I’ve been lashing out at everyone within arms reach as of lately and it appears as though I can’t pinpoint the exact cause for my actions.

I want to be happy…yet, I can’t define the word. As strange as it may seem and appear, I am a loner that lives thru the eyes of others. I put myself in others lives yet I invite few if any into mine. I jokingly made a status update on facebook that said “ I don’t think outside the box, I bring people into mine”. While a joke at the time, my humor seems to be more truthful than I can readily admit…I just didn’t see it at the time.

I’m hurting people around me and I’m slowly killing myself in the process. When I don’t want to be bothered…I shut down and all but evaporate from all things social. What was once a great gift of humorous and thinly veiled sarcasm has abruptly turned into vengefully spewed verbal darts propelled by a slick tongue wrapped in anger. Simply put, my words have been causing much pain. The sad reality of it all is that I’m fully aware of my actions…yet, I do it anyway and try nothing to avoid it.

I need. I want. I have to get away.

*pops a sleeping pill only to remember the sudden drug fueled deaths of Heath Ledger and Brittany Murphy….spits pill on the floor*

~fin~

Fellas, I’m going to say this one time…

                                                                                                

tiger-woods

Pussy is undefeated.


YOU.CAN'T.WIN.


Pound for pound pussy is the champ. Nothing is even close to being a contender.
Mike Tyson couldn't win. Muhphucka was heavyweight champion of da' world at 21. Y'alls a damn fool if you think Buster Douglas knocked that muhphucka out. Robin Givens gave that crazy negro the tko and mike was still wobbly @ the knees when he went in the ring with Buster.


2Pac couldn't win.


Rob Lowe couldnt win.

Mike Jordan had umpteen championship rings,the most successful shoeline in history...The pussy knocked him out. Muhphucka could dunk on anyone in the league, score sixty but he dropped the ball when he tried to charge against Juanita.

Eric Benet ain't win...I'm not saying that Halle ain't no loon but still what regular dude wouldn't do everything in his power to keep her. I mean Eric had Halle, Lost her and muhphuckas ain't paid attention to his ass since. Muhphucka can't give you a free download much less a hit record.


Kobe Couldn't win. Sure he's faired better than most but in the long run...he's a draw at best.


Shaq couldn't win...he thought he was winning. cheated wife took him back. Next thing you know he's filming a reality show and swimmin' with Mike Phelps and his wife is flying back, back to Cali, Cali leaving Shaq crying that "Damn, she trying to stick me for my paper (C) Biggie.

Hugh Grant couldn't win. Muhphucka had Liz Hurley and cheated on her with a prostitute.


Jude Law ain't win. muhphucka cheated with the nanny. (she cute though)..but now the muhphucka can't star in a movie if he produced it himself.
and lets not even talk about Steve McNair...this muhphucka cheated on his wife and the bitch he cheated with gave him a 2 pc with a biscuit.


And y'all a damn fool if y'all think that ya boy Tiger is gonna be able to come out on top after all of this. Pussy is undefeated.


Pussy almost did ya boy Jesus H.Christ in...if you think Mary Magdalene wasn't 'bout to set ya boy for the okie doke then you're mistaken.


Pussy - infinity
Men- 0


You.Cant.Win (C) Mike Jackson in "THE WIZ".

My internet friends make me laugh….

and this is no different. Thanks BuildingBlock for putting this up. I have watched this no less than 20 times in the past hour. The part where ol’ girl walks in and you say “i’m in here with my internet friends” makes me know that i’m not the only one with a screw loose.  If y’all don’t laugh at this, you’re void of all vital function, pulse and brain activity. There’s not a bunch of shit that makes me all out laugh but dammit I lost all ability to  hold back my laughter while viewing this shit.  The fact that D’Apostrophe is trying to keep his offline world and online world separate only to have one walk in on the other is hilarious in itself.

I won’t mention the parallel internet universe where he and I are both members…because as we all know that The first rule of Fight Club is, you do not talk about Fight Club.

Live, Love, Laugh…wash and repeat.

~fin

 

Depression Starts talking…..

Depression starts talkin and his voice is raspy
CAUSE HE ain't SHUT THE FUCK UP IN 3 AND A HALF WEEKS!
Look, beard is full, hair is nappy
These jeans ain't mine so they way too baggy
Priorities fucked shit startin to gas me
it's like my lil' man's life slipped right past me….© Joe Budden “Are You In the Mood, Yet?

 

The above verse from the embedded song speaks volumes and gives great insight as to how I’m feeling these days. It’s funny how songs say things that you just don’t have the power or will to say/express on your own. Sadly, I’ve felt this way for a while and this happens to be one of my favorite songs of all times. Depression is no stranger to me and because of it, I’m usually “off the scene” a lot. The past few weeks have been no different. Usually repeated listens of this song are all that is needed to snap me back to the harsh realities of every day life…but recently there’s some strange lingering feelings that I just can’t seem to shake or rid myself free from….

 

Don’t fret, I’ll be back to my normal (sarcastic self) soon. I just have to deal with a few demons and internal conflicts that are probably too intense yet seemingly superficial for me to put on the internet right now….

 

~fin.

I Spam Spammers Pt. 4

I gotta admit this Nigerian is going full steam with this sh*t. He replied to my other email with this response and word document form for me to fill out.

Here’s Mr. Ofori’s response.

SUBJECT: SEE THE ATTACHED FORM AND PROCEED

...

Sat, December 5, 2009 1:32:28 AM

From: bernard ofori bernardofori05@gmail.com

To: Kae Williams phishgreese@yahoo.com

THE APPLICATION.doc (22KB)


Dear Williams

See the application form attached . Kindly Re-write and fill it proper and contact my bank head office through their emails on the form as I instructed you to enable them order the transfer to your account, please we have to make sure that this transaction is completed without delay and that is why you need to do everything fast so that the fund will be transferred to your account without delay to enable me start my arrangement on how we will meet for sharing and Investment in your country.

Regards
Bernard Ofori

Here’s the form that was sent to me as a  word document.

THE APPLICATION.
Please I want you to re-write the below application letter (if possible with your business letter head paper) and send it to my head office so that they can commence with the transfer immediately.
The Bank numbers are:
Tel: 00233206948471

Email: icbforeignremittdept@officeliveusers.com

Private email to Mrs. Ofori: stellaoforimrs@yahoo.co.uk ,
the above is the direct lines for the International Remittance Department.
Attn: Mrs. Stella Ofori

The Director/Controller
International Remittance Department of the

International Commercial Bank of Ghana

Madam,
I am an escrow call account owner in your bank.
Account name (fill your name here)

Account number: 0692235688
Beneficiary: (fill your name here)
Amount: Three Eight Million, Five Hundred thousand United States dollars (USD$3, 500,000.00) International Commercial Bank of Ghana Limited. Makola Shopping Mail Accra Ghana.P.O Box 20057 Accra-Ghana

I wish to close and transfer my fund to my bank account in my country.
My Bank particulars are:
Account name ....................................................
Account number................................................
Beneficiary..........................................................
Bank name and Address...................................
Swift code............................................................
ABA No,..............................................................
I will be delighted if my request is favorably considered, it has been my pleasure doing business with your Bank.
My new contact address is (Fill in your current address here)
Telephone number ......................
Fax number...................................
Thank you for your kind co-operation.
Yours Faithfully,
(Your name and signature).

I Spam Spammers (Pt. 3.2)

Flag this message

Thanks

Friday, December 4, 2009 11:24 PM

From: "Kae Williams" <phishgreese@yahoo.com>

To: bernardofori05@gmail.com

Bernard,
Its only by fate, that I'm a church fearing man or else I'd think that you were trying to scam me. I see this stuff on the news all the time but for some reason I feel that you're truly sincere in your responses to me and for that reason alone I want to help you out. I've was scammed a few years ago when I searched online for something to help me with my low sex drive and erectile disfunction and by chance I received an email from someone overseas and they sent me some pills that promised to increase my shaft length and girth...to my chagrin the only thing i received was a lighter bank account and some pills that increased my blood pressure...but since your proposition has nothing to do with anything that could affect my health, I'm more than eager to assist you.


I withheld the truth from you earlier and my reasons for doing so was to test your sincerity in our actions with one another. I lied about not having a checking account. I do have one but the only draw back is that the mother of my 4 kids is also on that account as an authorized user. She is on the account as per the ruling of our most recent child support court case. This child support judgment is reason alone as to why I am desperate to help you. I am currently paying more than $1100 a month for the care and support of those illegitimate and unwanted children of mine even though my documented income is only $2400 a month. These U.S. courts are crazy to believe that a man with as many hoes as myself can support himself and his sexual habits on $1300 a month. But that's neither here nor there, please send me all of the proper and necessary forms so that we can get the ball rolling and in turn become the millionaires that we're destined to be.

Kae Williams

Spamming the Spammer (ptIII)

This is Mr. Ofori's latest response in the Spam the Spammer Saga. How in the hell you make a $4 million dollar mistake and act like it isn't nothing?....


-----Original Message-----
From: bernard ofori <bernardofori05@gmail.com>
Sent: Friday, December 04, 2009 9:07 AM
To: Kae Williams
Subject: Re: THANKS.

You are so funny? anyway, I made a mistake at first by typing $7.5 million, it was a typographical errow, I intended to write $3.5 million, it was a mistake and no one is above mistake when it comes to writing.

Listen I am not here for joke, I really mean business, but if you are not ready to handle this with me, then you can let me know so that I can look for someone else, I am not going to send you anything money to open account because I don't have anything to send you, I have only secure this $3.5 million on escrow call account and I have no access to it as I have deposited it with no beneficiary name just for onward transfer and that is why I contacted you to stand and claim it as the beneficiary.

You can provide any bank information for a bank to bank transfer of this fund to your account, this is an international fund transfer and it requires a bank account for such transfer not a paypal account.

Right now I am not sure if you are serious, but if you are serious, kindly let me know so that I can istalled your informations into the account data of this fund so that the account will appear in your name, and I will also give you the application form immediately I haer from you which you will fill and contact my bank head office for the transfer of this fund to your account.

Let me hear from you

Bernard


I Spam Spammers (pt II)

Below is the 2nd part of the ongoing Spammer saga with Mr. Bernard Ofori. Unbeknownst to him the address and phone number that I gave him is actually for Ace Cash America…some check cashing joint down the road from my home. Happy reading!!! (remember read his email first before reading mine)

Re: THANKS.

...

Thu, December 3, 2009 8:08:24 PM

From:Kae Williams phishgreese@yahoo.com

To:bernard ofori <bernardofori05@gmail.com>


Dear Mr. Ofori,
Man, I'm not reading all that. Let's cut the chase and get down to business. I don't have a checking account with any bank at the current moment but I do have a check cashing card account and a paypal account. I'd prefer that you put the money in my paypal account if possible If you need to contact me or send me something please do so at this address .

Kae Williams

2858 Delk Road
MARIETTA, GA 30067

(770) 952-6535

I suddenly feel as if you're trying to scam me because the first email you sent said that you were going to deposit 7.5 million dollars into my account and now you've reduced it to 3.5 million dollars. Now I've heard of taking a little off the top but man you're trying to stick me for my paper for the sum of about 4 million dollars. What the business is? Now I've heard of shady business practices but man you could've waited till my pants were down before you tried to fuck me raw dog style.  Due to your shrewd business practices and since you're in such of a dire need of my help, I'm asking for $365.90 to be paid in exactly 73 five dollar bills and 18 unmarked nickels. The unmarked nickels are essential because I've been tracked by the government before for running a snack machine scam and this time I don't want the nickels to get back to me.
Mr. Ofori...or since we're now 3 emails deep on this exchange, I feel at liberty to be able to call you Bernard since I seem to be the one in the power position as you need my account to  launder your Weezy F. Babies...(Ha, you like that don't cha? Weezy F, Young Money? Get it?...wait maybe you don't because you're probably in some prepaid internet cafe in the better part of Ghana while I'm stuck trying to reply to you on my phone...Do you know how hard it is to type on your cell phone? I'm not talking about one of those new cell phones either . I have a bag phone with a black and white screen and a pull out antenna. Sorry to bore you with the details of my deplorable living standards but I am just trying to relay to you how desperate I am for the whole 7.5 million dollars to be put into my account.
So hit me back with the $365.90 to let me know that you're serious and we can definitely do business. Once I get the money, I'll buy you a ticket and fly you out to GA and put you in my new guest house and we'll invite some bitches over and I'll show you how us Americans have a fun time.
Sincerely, your brother in the cause.
Kae Williams


From: bernard ofori <bernardofori05@gmail.com>
To: Kae Williams phishgreese@yahoo.com
Sent: Thu, December 3, 2009 6:07:17 AM
Subject: Re: THANKS.

Dear Mr.williams

Thanks for your kind and prompt reply to my proposal to you, be rest assured that this transaction is legally deposited and we are going to have a smooth transfer of this fund to your account as long as you stick on my instructions and guidelines, ones again, I really appreciate your willingness to assist in this transaction.

I'm the Regional Manager of International Commercial Bank of Ghana Ltd, as the regional manager of this  bank, it is my duty to send in a financial report to my head office in the capital city Accra at the end of each bank business year.
During my 2008 financial report to my bank head office, I discovered that my branch in which I am the manager made three million five hundred thousand united state dollars($3,500,000.00) which my head office are not aware of and will never be aware of it,and I have placed this funds on escrow call account with no beneficiary name hence I decided to contact you to stand and claim the fund as the owner who made the deposit with my branch so that the bank will order the transfer to your account.
Meanwhile, the transfer of this fund will take place from my bank head office because that is where we have our international remittance department, so all you have to do is to apply for the transfer in my bank head office with the application form and the details of this fund which I will give to you immediately I hear from you to give me your assurance that you will not betray me in this transaction  because I would not want anything that will bridge this transaction on the way which might be as result of misunderstanding in this matter which I will not like and that is why I need your full assurance to proceed this transaction with you because I will not want anything that will stop this matter on the way because I can not afford to loose this fund, kindly ask any question which you might need clearification so that you can understand everything for us to proceed with one mind and full understanding to avoid any future arguement or mistake in this matter.
Like I told you, I contacted you because I can not be directly connected to this fund since I am still in service with this bank and we are not allowed to own such amount as civil servants or to operate a foreign account, so you can understand my position in this matter which is my main reason of contacting you to assist me to acheive this goal, your assistance is all I need to acheive this fund by standing as the real depositor and claim the fund from my bank since I will also guide you accordingly and provide to you all the necessary back up information of this fund which will authomatically empower you as the beneficiary of this fund.
I will also advise you to keep this transaction secret and confidential and that is all I need from you because I will not want any thing that will expose this transaction and you should not mention my name in my head office while dealing with them to avoid any question in my bank head office during the transfer, kindly get back to me so that I can explain this clear to you and to enable me give all information you will need after your proper understanding in this matter for me to give you all information you need to contact my bank head office for the transfer of this fund to your account, I will also install and configure your full name and address into the account data base of this fund  immediately I hear from you to make sure that everything to appeard in your name as the beneficiary and the depositor of this fund who made the deposite with my branch.

You should also send me your full details such as your full name and address including your direct phone number so that I can install them into the account data of this fund so that everything will appear in your name as the beneficiary.
Note that we have no much time to spend in this transaction because the transfer supposed to be completed within 4 banking days immediately you apply to my head office for transfer.
I am waiting to hear from you so that we can go over the details and proceed.


Mr.Bernard Ofori

I Spam Spammers in My Spare Time

 

This is what happens when you give a muhphucka like me an internet connection and an e-mail address. I do this sh*t all of the time when I have nothing better to do.  Read it from the bottom up.

 

 

Re: THANKS....

From:

Kae Williams <phishgreese@ymail.com

To:bernard.ofori05@gmail.com


Dear Bernard,

I would love to help you...do you think you could send me a $25 in U.S. currency so that I could open up a checking account. I currently only have a savings account and I'd need you to help me so that I can in turn help you? Let me know it this works out for you and I'll be glad to send you my address.
Sincerely,
your brother in the cause.

Kae Williams
phishgreese@ymail.com

"I've learned that it takes years to build up trust...and it only takes suspicion, not proof to destroy it"


From: Mr Bernard Ofori <bernard@yahoo.com>
Sent: Tue, December 1, 2009 1:18:15 PM
Subject: THANKS.
Hello,i need your co-operation,
My name is Mr Bernard Ofori,
I wish to make a transfer involve $7.5m into your account. For subsequent investment of it in lucrative ventures in your country.
Please, if you are willing to assist kindly reply by stating your assurance and total commitment to handle this transaction,
Then I shall furnish you with the procedure to follow-up the transaction. As soon as you read, I will be expecting your timely response.
While replying please kindly include your telephone and Fax number for easy communication.
Please observe the utmost confidentiality, and be rest assured that this,
Upon your response, I shall then provide you with more details and relevant documents that will help you understand the transaction. asap,
Regards,
Mr. Bernard Ofori